The Yoga I do

The yoga I do is in caves
my practice may be completely exclusive....
although all are welcome
i look at this as a very personalize prayer
in a cave
with myself, by myself......
for now......

Death

Death is the final frontier, I think for most people, but especially me.
I believe without my pressing fear of death, I would succumb to my lower self. I wonder how my moral standing would really be? Is it my fear that makes me constantly check my own intentions.....
It's funny how you can hate, detest and wish death on a "enemy".....Yet experience a tremendous amount of guilt, once you realize how many people are effected by this persons passing.
When it comes to death, someone always loses......



*Note to self......Stay diligent in your practice....and be kind

and remind me why i can't have my cake and eat it too.

I'm just saying that whole phrase irritates me.....

Love, painful wrist, and schedules

So lately
those have been my topics
Love Teacher Training
My wrist hurt, due to having to re-learn proper alignment
Crazy schedules
Trying to have metta for it all......
I am just out there now
with NO parachute
cuz i just learned how to fly

Anger Issues

So Lately I have been encountering people who either take my kindness for weakness or perceive me as being a pushover due to my kindness. Ahisma, has been the most difficult of my yoga pursuits by far. Anger is a natural emotions for me, but my anger is expressed as total annihilation,"She killed the dog too, sort of anger". I work hard not to indulge these emotions, and actually find it very embarrassing. That loss of control sucks. Life is precious and with my karma any life that I take definitely would be taken from me also.
It's that deep.
So what to do.....
I tend to feel like the Incredible Hulk. I have to retreat every now and again, in order to not unleash a deadly wrath of lifeless bodies.
I pray and pursue prayer
and have taken to embracing and allowing people in my life that don't arouse this anger, until I can began to allow it to dissipate som3. Many people don't get that I don't have a god to fear no a devil,
if it wasn't for seeing the ebb and flow of my good deeds vs. my bad deeds (which I don't view usually as good or bad, just things that happened) I would be pretty screwed. Truth be told it's simply fear and attachment to this Earth. Destroy or be Destroyed. I choose too love and be loved.OM OM OM

Ashtanga Yoga makes me say ouchie.

Today I practice with Mary Flinn, at her studio Mount Airy Yoga.
Talk about intense. I love being a student, a student of life, love, yoga. I love it.
The experience was intensely humbling (in a painful sort of way). Pain has always served as inspiration for me. At some point I sink into the pain so much, there's no place else to go with it, so you began to let go. I am constantly questioning, "Why do I do yoga?". Every time I ask myself theres always a different inner response......"To have a hard body", "To have a VAJRA mind", "To feel more connected with my surroundings, be kinder" so on and so forth. Today when I ask myself the same question, I realize the original answer that bought me to Yoga over a decade ago......To prepare to lose everything....DETACHMENT.
However this response will most likely change too.
Thank you Mary Flinn.